simple things deserve a simple explanation

I'm thankful.... God's really blessing my heart.

Last night I did not want to go to work (sinuses = lame). I've been sick all week, well since Tuesday. And for some reason it was getting better, it felt, until last night when I woke up. Ugh. But I toughed it out and went, expecting to get like hate-mail from my patients about their dirty nurse who stands in the hallway sneezing, coughing, and blowing her nose all the time (I washed my hands so much last night that my hands are like red, cracking, and raw. They hurt so badly. Yay for nursing!). Instead, God used them to really bless me. Two of the men told me how beautiful I was, granted they were 60+ and missing half of their original teeth. But they said that if they weren't married they'd ask me to marry them in a heartbeat (really, men are you that lame? I choose to think not). Then I got an admission at like 10 pm... not my favorite thing. But it seemed to be a calm enough night that I was ok with it. I think that patient in particular blessed me. I don't know how we started talking about church (clearly a God thing), but he was telling me about his and asking me questions about mine, and how I'm feeling welcomed here. I kind of felt my guard breaking.... I mean, we didn't get into this earth-shattering conversation or anything, but I just needed to feel a connection like that. And God provided. My heart just longed for a frequency that was in tune with God, I guess. It was so nice to have someone care. It was mutual- I was physically caring for him, and he was emotionally caring for me. An unfair reciprocal, clearly. He was such a pleasant, honest man. He told me a little bit about his church. It sounds huge like West Side, but I think I may visit there, when he's out of the hospital. I'd love to see what they have to offer.

I got my ipod :-) Now I just need to find the time to put some music on there when I'm not working (which will be when?!?!?!) before I make the drive to FL. I also need to go find an adapter/fm transmitter that I can use.

It was so wonderful to go home, even if it was just for a day and a half. And even if I was sick on the couch with Danielle all day. Gosh, I miss home.

I'm really sad that I'm spending another holiday alone.... like really sad. Christmas Eve and Christmas I'll be alone. I work Christmas Eve so that won't seem as bad, I don't think. It's still so tough... looking at holiday pictures of my family. Knowing that they all at least have one person to spend their day with. I'm sick of being lonely :-(